
The Importance of being able to be Alone
It is rare that you get sadder once you step out into nature on your own. It is rare that your mood lowers.
Have you ever tested your ability to be alone?
Not lonely, but alone. Remember the difference?
Because not all time spent on one’s own is painful. As Anthony De Mello once said, “Loneliness is not cured by human company. Loneliness is cured by contact with reality.”
And to him, reality meant dropping one’s illusions, the distorted way we see the world. Other people can be fruits and treats – the finer things in life that we constantly enjoy, but never need. At other times, we use other people as distractions and blinders, helping us divert our gaze away from the mirror. We use them to fill an empty void which is not theirs, but ours.
Take time alone and let your thoughts speak.
Go sit in the park, or go for a long drive or walk. Turn up the volume on your mental-radio and hear what your thoughts have to say. In that moment, Astro the Dog will tell you what he sees in your life – your subconscious will leak the truth.
Remember this dog is within the confines of your mind, and so, it just reflects what it sees. If your mind is a dark room, it will bark out of fear of the darkness.
If your mind is a room filled with light and wonder, the dog will run, jump and play merrily. What it sees is not the way it always has to be or stay – but it is the reality of your perception, the filters through which you look at the world right now.
When do you walk the dog?
You must walk your dog. In this case, the dog is your subconscious mind, the part of your Iceberg that lies beneath the surface. Don’t distract the dog and delay the inevitable.
The person who is not comfortable on their own is not comfortable with their own company, and that is a problem to be confronted.
And how to resolve it? I can’t say for sure, though I suspect the first step is pausing, listening, and trying to understand.
Your instincts, whose voice you’ve drowned out with the crowd, with constant television and work, can be heard once you go to a quiet place. These instincts will tell you what is needed, and once you listen and interpret them, you can go forward.
It’s time to test your ability to be alone.
As a Disney movie which featured a young lion king once taught us, it doesn’t matter what distance you traverse. You cannot run away from who you are – you live in your body, in your soul, and your feet cannot run away from the mind that directs them.
There is nowhere to hide.